BUZZ

The boredom monster has taken over again. Apart from a delightful (chuckle) blog entry this morning, I have done squat. Zilch. Zero. Nothing.
Well, I have been looking through my travel photos from last summer and selecting prints. Other than that, I officially have the most unproductive job EVER. It doesn’t help that Boss 1 and 2 are away enjoying the sunshine of the sunshine state. L-U-C-K-Y. The highlight of my morning was the delivery of more Poland Spring water jugs so that I may commence my daily bathroom runs. So far I’ve only gone once. That’s a record. Oh, and, someone cleaned the area above the microwave and organized the crap up there and put a glass jar full of Tootsie Pops. Let’s just see if there are any left by the end of the day. Mwa ha ha! Their mistake for shoving me into the conference room. It’s not like I’m really bitter. I’m not. But writing this blog makes me sarcastically so. It’s quite fun.
Let’s see. What else did I do? Ah yes, I declared war against the savage fly buzzing around the room earlier. I grabbed a mini booklet of jewelry prices and began swatting at it whenever it flew by. Ah there it is again! It had left but now the evil fly has RETURNED. BOO. Well, anyway, I hit it twice and thought I had killed it and dropped its little body into my bag. I then emptied the bag item by item and flipped it upside down hoping that there would be no carcasses there later. Nothing came out. And yet, the fly was no where to be found. Well, it has re-appeared. Twice. Which means I was unsuccessful in killing it. We shall see. It will not live past this afternoon if I am the excellent hunter I have trained myself to be in my one year of higher education. Whatever that means.

Fridays are for …

Day 11
I commenced in my usual manner. Boredom, boredom, BLOG! After taking a good amount of time
Right before lunch, my fellow intern and I were given an assignment that might as well have been written in hieroglyphics. Who really knows what Boss meant? Anyway, it’s officially 1:15 and we still have not received clarification. Off to browse more shoes.
*Just in!* I cracked up M and E. Apparently, E refers to vanilla cupcakes, namely M’s vanilla cupcakes she brought in from home, as “bad boys”. I kindly reminded him of the ridiculousness of his comment, considering my eighth grade teacher used to refer to sentence structures as Bad Boys. Oh boy. Ahem, Oh bad boy.
They then proceeded to discuss how far each would go to win a million dollars on Fear Factor. Neither would each a cockroach right now if it were crawling across the floor. I don’t blame them. We all proceeded to watch a spider being devoured on YouTube. Minus me. Eep!

So it’s a good thing I don’t get paid. Well, for the company anyway. I have officially done nothing. Pretty much all day, with the exception of a post. Wheeeee!

The Water Girl

Day 10:
Day 10 was fun, oh yes. Besides boredom, I actually accomplished a few things. For one, I learned how to make a linesheet! That’s right ladies and gentleman, a real LIVE linesheet! Complete with two hours of backbreaking work (not really) trying to figure out how to compress all these tiny images into one sheet and growing frustrated, only to send it in and realize it could have been done in two pages! Grrrr. And so I rushed through the end of the day in a frenzy of linesheet business. But that was just the end of the day. The morning was way more fun. It went a little like this. Write blog. Take three hours on it. No one is watching. Damn I must seem like a terrible employee. One day this will get back to me when future employers read this. Anyhow, I fixed a few product things then… Yawn. And then, – this is where the fun part comes in – I devote the day to making myself a pretty little blog! Hehe. That was the pinnacle of my day, the absolute most productive time. Too bad it had nothing to do with my job. Don’t get me wrong, I am constantly thinking up new blog ideas. But really, how long can that take? I feel my brain whittling away as I grow restless. I do have a fun time swatting at flies though. Oh, I had forgotten to mention my unlikely circumstances. As the main office is too full, I am banned to the far corners of the conference room. There I requench my thirst on a quarter hour basis, so that I am in the bathroom at least once an hour. Others may wonder what the heck is the matter with me. But only I know the truth . Anyhow, in this lovely conference room, little flies dance through the air and I crunch their wings as I smack them down. Population control. On the rare occassion that another intern is MIA, I get the opportunity to move into the main room! “Congratulations! Take one step forward.” It’s like climbing a ladder in Chutes and Ladders! Only that the ladder turns into a slide as soon as the missing person returns. Oh well. It’s interesting to be in civilization once in a while. And then I return to solitude. Solitary confinement. Where my thoughts run free and … Yep that’s where the thought train ends. Crash.
After my quickie lunch. Which it generally is since I pick up a salad at Whole Foods a few blocks down. I was joined in the conference room by two co-workers who were taking their lunch break. One, E, kept asking me to refill his water because I was closer and willing to do so. I’m so nice. Well, the third and final time I got up, I was walking back, cup brimming with water, and I knocked into my chair and sent water flying everywhere. Hahaha. It really was hilarious. He was also laughing. Great fun. Except the clean up. God I’m clumsy. Waay to go Goof. End of Day 10.

Boooredom

Days 2-9:
Yes, these can be bunched together. They felt like one giant blob anyway. A blob of product descriptions being written and published on the website, blogs ideas being wretched out and posted, and counting down the minutes until lunch. [38 minutes remaining]. I have determined that my job is a hazard. To my wallet. And savings. And possibly future down-payment on a mortgage. College savings? Gone. Why, you may ask? Because putting up descriptions for glorious jewelry I cannot afford is simply energy draining! And to say I was never a huge fan of jewelry to begin with! But now, rings, bracelets and necklaces galore! I want them all! [insert Little Mermaid song here].
What to do, what to do. One year of higher education down the drain with boredom. Not to say I didn’t want this job. I did. And I enjoy it. In the 1-2 hours when I am actually doing something productive. Sigh.

Ah but the occasional days are fun. Such as the day 90s boy bands poured through the offices, filling our ears and touching our hearts… I kid.

Introduction

So there’s this lady who cleans for us. And she is evil. She is the evil cleaning lady of suite ###. Her favorite pastime? Asking me to move. No, no, not kindly. More of moving my things until she elicits a response from me. And then I move. Sometimes she mumbles thank you. Rarely. I wonder what secret things she is contemplating. Mwa haha! But really, I don’t think I like her.

So neverending boredom is part of my daily routine. While sifting through blogs, I happened to find this fun one with mysterious rings: http://www.glassfiction.blogspot.com/

Hello World!

Day 1:
After waiting for nearly an hour for my new boss to arrive and give me something to do, I began my official job of blogging. My instructions? Browse for good blogs. Think of something to write about. Commence.
After about, half an hour of searching, I was bored to tears. Gulp. Four blogs and ten ideas later, I was more lost and desperate than ever. More instructions, please!? No such luck. [Apparently, as I would come to know, directions are few and boredom is often. Swiftly and silently, it takes over and engulfs my days. Not to say the job itself is displeasing. Rather, I have altogether too much time on my own and without supervision.] Around one o’clock or so, when my stomach was devouring my intestines, I had the notion that I was allowed to ask if I could have lunch. My hunger overcame my timidness and off I went to a fifteen minute line at Subway. “Of course she’s a new intern,” people at Subway must have thought, the way I was huddled in a corner table scarfing down my roast beef sandwich. I must have looked the way a mouse does, trapped by a housecat in a corner. Struggling in the final moments before an awful, embarrassing death. Oh geez. Well, regardless how cowardly and silly I must have come across that first day of work, I immediately grew less timid over time [ I even went on Facebook in the following weeks - rebel!]. Haha. Day 1 ended with a bang. Not really. But, you know, it’s always fun to think it was more exciting than not.